Barry Facts -- Obama Family Edition

Barack Obama's parents met because they needed medical insurance to get to Selma.

Michelle Obama's parents met because they resented not having a personal trainer who knew the value of fresh fruit.

Jesus once had a Come To Barack moment.

When Barack Obama comes, he will make the oceans salty again.

When Barack Obama comes, children will like going to school again.

When Barack Obama comes, frog legs will taste like chicken.

When Barack Obama comes, judges will know how to write laws.

Barack Obama's uncle grandfather great uncle imaginary friend helped free Auschwitz and Treblinka Buchenwald.

Barack Obama fosters a workplace that is open and sensitive to the personal needs of staff before they are unceremoniously fired for the candidate's mistakes.

Barack Obama feels that it's important to shield his wife from criticism, which is why he asks her to make campaign speeches critical of America.

Barack Obama didn't even know Tony Rezko before they bought a house together.

Barack Obama's birth certificate doesn't say he's not a Muslim.

Barack Obama doesn't wear a helmet when he rides a limousine.

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