Move Over, Chuck Norris

There's a new demigod in town:

Barack Obama is so manly that he once got a haircut and passed on the talcum powder.

Barack Obama once scuffed his shoe and walked around with it like that all day -- on purpose.

Barack Obama once bowled his age.

Barack Obama is in his wife's Five.

Barack Obama once bit the head off a Tootsie Roll almost all at once.

Very Barry, puddin' n' pie, kissed a girl and made himself cry.

Barack Obama doesn't take money from lobbyists -- he hires them.

Barack Obama is so patriotic that he votes in almost every Senate session.

Barack Obama can file his own fingernails.

The American Flag is so patriotic it doesn't have to wear an Obama lapel pin.

Barack Obama is so centrist that he is friendly with people who believe the Japanese attacked Pearl Harbor.

Barack Obama is happy that the Red Sox beat the curse and won the Super Bowl.

Barack Obama is so bipartisan that he may give Cabinet spots to Hillary supporters.

Sphere: Related Content