Thursday, May 10, 2007

The Democrat Manifesto

To be a Democrat in the 21st Century:

  1. You have to believe the AIDS virus is spread by lack of Federal funding.

  2. You have to believe that the school system that can't teach a fourth grader how to read is some how the best qualified to teach those same children all about sex.

  3. You have to believe that guns, in the hands of law abiding Americans, are more of a threat than U.S. nuclear weapons technology in the hands of Chinese communists.

  4. You have to believe there was no art before Federal funding.

  5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical, documented changes in the earth's climate, and more affected by Americans driving SUVs.

  6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial, but being homosexual is natural.

  7. You have to be against capital punishment but support abortion on demand.

  8. You have to believe that business creates oppression and governments create prosperity.

  9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but loony activists from Seattle do.

  10. You have to believe the Iraq war was started for the purpose of giving Halliburton a bunch of no bid contracts.

  11. You have to believe that Fox News is the root of all evil.

  12. You have to believe that the most important foreign policy objective is to is for the rest of the world to "like us" and to believe that is actually possible.

  13. You have to believe that Hurricane Katrina is an good example of how much George Bush hates black people.
Here are some more more suggestions.

(w/t: daveinboca)


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